Being Green
by Emerald Haze
Summary: Collectors aren't the only thing on Shepard's mind when fate has him meet up with a familiar face.
1. Chapter 1

_"Maybe sometime, when I'm not organizing the colony and you're not... doing whatever you do."_

With a scoff, she downed the bottom of her glass.

"Yeah, _maybe_."

She wasn't sure what she had expected. In fact, if she was even expecting anything. She said those words on impulse, it felt like. Now that she thought about it, she wasn't sure if she meant it. Then again, did it matter? Nothing came of it, or will.

With a shrug of disappointment, she downed the drink the bartender poured for her.

She got up after that. The bartender had refused give her more, reminding her she had a shuttle to catch. It didn't take long for her to remember what the bartender was talking about. It all started there. It all continued there. Might as well have it all end there too. She transferred the credits from her omni-tool, and sent off for the shuttle bay.

_'Goddess,'_ she thought miserably. 'How did I end up so far away?'

It all seemed so far away now. It seemed like better times too. Was she really that naïve? No. She wasn't, she reassured herself. It wasn't her fault. There had been nothing that she could do. If even a matriarch couldn't resist, how could she have hoped to? With a reassuring smile, she reminded herself that she was lucky. _She escaped._

Others, she had seen them. She feared becoming like them. But every day, looking in the mirror, she knew she wouldn't. Even when the whispers were at their strongest, she felt like she had a fighting chance, somehow. Her own nightmares, the horrible deeds she committed in its name, they kept her grounded. Or maybe it was simpler than that. Maybe it was its control that, ironically, freed her. Squeezing her eyes shut in disgust, trying to block out the involuntary memories surfacing, she cast the thought aside.

"No," she scolded herself. "I'm not going there. Not tonight. Not again. Commandos are better than this."

Burying her face in her hands, she couldn't help the sobs that racked her body. She jumped slightly when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry, it's just that… um… your shuttle, ma'am. It's boarding," the owner of the hand said uncertainly.

"Oh," she wiped her tears away as she looked up. "Right, of course," she got up hastily before being stopped by the hand on her shoulder.

"The shuttle's _that way_, ma'am," he said softly pointing in the opposite direction she was heading.

"Right," she replied sheepishly before mumbling a quick apology and heading to where the man pointed.

With an impatient huff, she kicked off her boots. As she got up, she unzipped her suit and let it pool at her ankles before gingerly stepping the rest of the way out. With a heavy sigh, she fell face first on her bed. It had been a long trip, and an even longer meeting with the rest of the colonists.

"I missed you," her muffled voice filled the sheets in front of her. Her own hot breath tickling her slightly.

She grunted very loudly when she her terminal chimed. She knew it wouldn't stop until she viewed the e-mail, but she was really comfortable right now. Naked, she walked over to her terminal. She paused momentarily when she saw the sender.

She opened it, and read its contents very slowly.

She leaned back into her recliner, in a daze, not even aware of how cold her chair was on her bare back.

Snapping out of her reverie, she quickly replied.

_I would love to._

Send.

A faint smile crept up her lips. That was, to say, unexpected. Good, very good even, but unexpected. Suddenly, she felt so much more alive. The tenseness in her muscles was gone. The troubles of the colony seemed so trivial all of a sudden. She hugged her bare chest, eagerly anticipating another message.

_Great!_

The response flashed on her screen for a few seconds. Even after it had faded, she sat there, asleep, that small smile still ghosting her lips.

The red haired woman sat back in her seat.

"There, that wasn't so bad now, was it?" she asked herself smiling. "Just a quick message and poof: success!"

Shaking her head, the woman got up still grinning. Sure, it had taken her by surprise at first. In fact, the thought hadn't even crossed her mind. But she thought about it. It wasn't like she had had much time on her hands lately, even less for this kind of thing. Could she call it that? It was weird calling it that. It was, by all means, a date.

'A date,' she thought. She tried saying the words a few times, relishing the feel of forming the word with her mouth. It made her laugh.

A date. With an alien. An asari. Green, no less. Commander Shepard was going on a date with Shiala.


	2. Chapter 2

Incoherent moans were coming from behind the door. They pierced the silence of the apartment with the occasional scratching sounds and ruffling of clothes. There were voices coming from the room occasionally, between the moans. A conversation, spoken in soft, hushed tones. Quick and desperate the banter went back and forth.

"Like this?" a woman's voice asked, uncertainty tainting her otherwise calm voice.

"Yes! That's great!" said another with glee.

Another moan hung in the air and then silence, with furious shuffling about. The desperate cry only grew louder as time passed, and the sound of discarded clothing hitting the floor was all that was left.

"Let me give it a go."

"What are you doing? No, wait… stop! Don't!"

"Why?"

"Because that's… that's my…!"

A surprised cry, more like a yelp than anything interrupted the first speaker.

"Shiala…!" the second woman finally broke the awkward silence.

The green asari was so embarrassed she didn't even bother answering.

With a hand on her left hip, the other woman held out a black dress which was distressingly revealing. It was long, hanging slightly above the knees, but all along the sides there was no cloth leaving little to the imagination. The front too revealed much; a very low cut that would show ample amount of skin even on women with not as generous a chest as Shiala.

"It is too daring, and I am much too… too…" Shiala started, her voice trailing off as blood rushed to her cheeks.

Her friend's eyebrows shot up.

"I don't think she'd mind much, to be honest," her friend said looking back and forth between the asari and the dress. "In fact, you could use a little daring. Change. Now."

Shiala had the dress dropped onto her lap and she shyly stood and made her way to the bathroom to try on the dress. Shiala remembered buying the dress, it was so long ago. It was during her wilder years. They seemed so far away now, buried beneath all that military training.

"Come now, let's see!"

The asari carefully stood behind the door, opening it a crack to peer at her friend.

"Oh, yes, daring will do," her friend flashed her foxy grin and Shiala failed miserably to return it.

Shepard was waiting patiently by the restaurant door. She was quite proud of herself. Not only was she punctual, but she was early. Early is always good she mentally pat herself on the back.

She was happy that she found the time to do this. It had been months since she had last seen Shiala. Shepard had been very scared that having waited so long would have ruined any hope for success. But she had gotten caught up in her mission against the Collectors. She had somehow made it back alive. Surviving the Collectors had been one thing, but surviving Cerberus' wrath in the process was another. Shepard felt her mood instantly sour as she thought back on those happenings. It wasn't until she heard her name that she snapped out of her reverie.

"I pray that I did not make you wait long," the woman in front of her said. Shepard had been, however, too busy staring with her mouth hung open to properly answer, and could only muster a half-hearted sound of acknowledgement that was neither a yes or no.

"I am sorry?" Shiala asked, obviously uncomfortable with how Shepard was looking at her.

"We should get inside!" Shepard almost yelled quickly turning round and opening the door, holding it open for Shiala to pass first.

The restaurant was classy, to say the least, and quite a throwback to the past, but all the while maintaining a modern look. Tall, glass chandeliers hung from the ceiling, shining a warm orange light, setting the ambience wonderfully. Shepard was glad for the lighting. It hid her sure to be constant blush nicely she hoped. She wasn't sure what she expected when she invited Shiala for dinner. But what her asari companion was wearing definitely made Shepard uncomfortable in a pleasurable sense.

It took no time at all for them to be seated. Shepard let out a long sigh in attempt to regain composure. She hoped that her fame wouldn't get in the way of this outing she had planned. Giant advertisements with her face all over the Citadel weren't helping with her covert intentions during downtime. But thankfully they weren't bothered, saved for their hanar waiter who could hardly contain his joy upon first meeting the commander.

"This is one is honored and unworthy!" it almost shouted. Shepard had to beg the hanar to keep quiet; though promising to speak with it later in private seemed only to agitate the hanar further. Finally Shepard gave up on the idea of calming the hanar down, opting for it to come to terms with everything on its own instead.

The dinner was awkward to say the least. Whenever Shiala would try to strike up conversation, Shepard would look at her for but a split second before averting her gaze. The human commander did her best to answer the questions as shortly as possible, not wanting to let her discomfort show in her voice. Seeing how it seemed to be upsetting Shiala however, Shepard opted to ask her about Zhu's Hope. It seemed to have a mixed, if somewhat positive, effect.

"They are well, all things considered."

"I take it that your differences with…" For the life of her, the commander couldn't remember the name of the company that had taken advantage of the colony's misfortunes.

"Barrier Frontiers," Shiala supplied.

"Barrier Frontiers is all sorted then?" Shepard finished her question, downing the entirety of her wine glass in one gulp, trying to drown out her embarrassment.

"Yes, for now," Shiala was being curt. Obviously something was gnawing at her. It took a while before she finally set down her utensils, looking intently at Shepard. "Have I done something to offend you commander?"

Shepard stopped dead in her tracks.

"No, of course not!"

Shiala's stare only intensified.

"Shiala, listen… it's simply…"

"Yes?"

Shepard looked up from her reflection in the glass she was holding, daring to look at Shiala.

"You're very, very attractive tonight. And… I haven't been exactly… how to say it…"

Shiala's shoulders slumped a little. She could tell where this was going. This was the part where Shepard tells her that she had simply read too much into Shepard's invitation.

"I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable commander. If you'll excuse me…"

The asari got to her feet briskly, but was surprised to have Shepard stand up just as quickly, blocking her way. As the woman was about to ask her to step aside, she was silenced by Shepard's fierce stare. There was something stirring in her eyes. She could see it, but it hadn't been there before now. At least, she hadn't noticed as Shepard had been looking at anything but her until now.

"Let's go somewhere," Shepard said finally. "Anywhere."

The scent of sweat was in the air. The violent pulsing of the nightclub's music shook her to the bone. She'd never been one for clubs. Even during her earlier years, before she enlisted. She could tell it was the same for Shiala, at least, at first she thought she could. But the way the asari moved with her now, on the dance floor, gave her doubts.

Shepard's hands were at Shiala's waist, hugging her close. She felt beyond out of place in the club, but with her date in her arms like this, she felt much more at ease. Shiala had been taken aback by Shepard's brazen approach, but didn't say object.

As the music intensified, Shiala turned to face the commander. She draped her arms over Shepard's shoulders, behind her neck, pulling her closer. She looked deep into the commander's eyes. They were a brilliant green color, and they glowed in the dimly lit club. But reflecting off of them weren't the lights. It was lust. Pure, unconcealed and untamed lust.

Whatever doubts Shiala had vanished in that moment. She felt Shepard's lips press against hers and an explosion of feelings took place. Time stopped. Her eyes fluttered closed. The kiss was powerful. It seemed so natural even though they'd never done it before. Shepard was exerting a confidence, a dominance that reminded her of why she was infatuated with her in the first place. The commander's strength of character was her true beauty. There was nothing around them; the scent of sweat overshadowed by Shepard's perfume, the throbbing she was experiencing was her own heart about to burst, the drumming in her ears, the blood rushing to her brain. It was the most beautiful feeling in the world. With a gasp Shiala broke the kiss. Her eyes remained closed, and she rested her forehead against Shepard's for a moment.

"I think we need to change the scenery," Shepard breathed just loud enough for her to hear.

Weak in the knees, Shiala opened her eyes a crack, softly nodding in agreement.

The two women couldn't keep their hands off each other the entire way to Shepard's apartment. Between kisses, Shepard fumbled with her keys. When the door finally opened, she turned to kiss Shiala, dragging her into the apartment with her. She furiously fought with her dress shirt, uncaring if she damaged the buttons. She had plenty of others, she thought as she discarded it quickly.

Shiala broke their series of kisses, her lips instead feathering along Shepard's jawline, and then down her now revealed neck, ever going lower, and lower. She pinned the commander's arms above her head on the nearest wall in the hallway, continuing to lavish the woman's skin. She couldn't stand it anymore. That inseparable distance that seemed forever between them.

Shepard wriggled free of Shiala's grasp, taking her by the hand and leading her up the flight of stairs to her room. Once there, Shiala pushed Shepard onto the large bed. She unclipped the few clasps keeping her dress on her body, letting it pool at her feet. She stepped out of the puddle, still in her high heels. Shepard took it all in, her supple breasts –not that they were really hid– her slightly oily skin, the perfect curves and dips. She was perfect.

Before Shepard could react, she was pinned against her mattress, Shiala's lips on her collarbone. Shepard arched off the bed with a soft moan; she'd always had a weak spot there. She hadn't even noticed in her pleasure that Shiala had unclasped her bra. The asari didn't even break the kiss when taking it completely off, and she began playing with the commander's breasts.

Despite her best efforts, Shepard was spiraling out of control. It had been so long. She had wanted this so badly. The one person she'd ever wanted had no time for her anymore. But there was someone else who wanted her instead. And this someone was here, now. And this someone was one hell of a kisser.

Shepard wrestled against Shiala gently, trying to free herself of her pants. She quickly undid her belt. Shiala broke their kissing, gasping frantically for air and tore off the commander's pants.

"Finally," she laughed softly. "You are wearing far too much clothing for much too long."

It was Shepard's turn to laugh. She smirked at Shiala, sliding off her panties before pulling the asari in for more. They hugged, and kissed, their hands wildly tracing every inch of the other's body. Whenever they found a more sensitive spot, they would gently scratch each other in pleasure. It wasn't long before Shepard felt the first finger enter her roughly. With a small moan, Shepard bucked her hips into the intruding digit.

She grabbed a hold of Shiala's wrist, and then her hand, and her fingers, easing more of the asari's fingers inside. With a hot moan, Shepard threw her head backwards. Shiala was teasing her with her thumb, all while slowly pulling out and pushing back in. It was incredible. She hadn't realized how much she had missed. And then it dawned on her.

"Hey," Shiala looked at her in the eyes. "Join with me."

Shepard had stilled her breathing, waiting.

"Okay," the largest smile formed on Shepard's lips in the longest time. "Embrace eternity."

The asari was lying in bed. She had this lost look on her face, like she didn't know what to say, or what to do. She had never expected it would turn out it like that.

"Don't worry about it," Shepard said comfortingly, planting a soft kiss on her forehead before looking in Shiala's eyes again.

"This has never happened to me before," Shiala whispered, still shocked.

"You said it yourself, your biotics…" the commander started.

"I never thought that it would interfere with this as well."

"Like I said, don't worry about it. There're other ways to have fun," the human replied with a mischievous grin.

Shiala giggled at that. Shepard loved that sound.

"I guess there are," she answered before kissing Shepard.

"And we're just getting started," the commander said and returned the kiss.

Shiala broke the kiss, looking at Shepard again.

"If only…"

Shepard shushed her. She didn't need to be joined with the asari to know what she was thinking.

"I know."

"But how do I show you?"

"The human way."


	3. Chapter 3

Shiala woke with a start. Her breathing was heavy, she felt nauseous. Her skull felt like it was being split open. Closing her eyes, she tried to regulate her breathing. She sat up, hunched forward, clutching her chest. Her heart was furiously drumming against her ribs. Stealing a glance at the human in bed beside her, unaware and peaceful, she got out of bed. She went to the bathroom.

She turned on the lights, closing the door behind her. The green asari looked at her reflection in the mirror. Cold sweat gleamed on her skin; her pigmentation was slightly paler than usual. She felt her heart stop. Out of the corner of her eye, something moved.

"No…"

She broke down.

Shepard's eyes fluttered open. It was still dark in her apartment. She looked at her clock; it was still much too early for her to have woken up on her own. At first she thought it was because of the Normandy, until she heard the whimpers. Shepard's eyes, well-adjusted to the dark, scanned the room. She went to wake Shiala only to find her bed empty.

"Shiala?" the commander whispered urgently.

When only more whimpering answered her, Shepard shot out of bed, quickly drawing her personal handgun from the nightstand. Shepard was careful not to make any noise. If someone was intruding, she had to mask her presence as long as possible. And she needed to move fast.

She took cover by the doorway, carefully peering down the hallway. There was no sign of movement, but the commander wasn't convinced. Shiala's biotics being unstable, Shepard worried for her… the human commander wasn't sure what Shiala was to her. Friend seemed too impersonal for what they shared. But this wasn't important. What was important was that Shiala was possibly in danger. And the asari, even though a commando, wasn't at her best.

Quietly, Shepard made her way down the hallway. She made sure to not turn on any lights. Rounding the corner, Shepard saw the room to the bathroom closed. She paused. The human commander was confused. The lights were off, none of the alarms had been tripped, and there was still no sign of any intruders. But she wasn't about to let her guard down. Cautiously, the human approached the bathroom door. She could tell that the whimpering was coming from there. Leaning her ear against the door, she strained to hear what was going on.

"I was not strong enough. Not then and not now. I am sorry… " Shiala's voice, raw, interrupted by sobs went on. There was no answer, and it left Shepard wondering who she could possibly be speaking to.

With her weapon still in hand, she used her free hand to open the door. She quickly turned on the light on her weapon to the highest setting in hopes of blinding whoever Shiala was speaking to.

"Stop!" Shepard yelled as Shiala's eyes widened in horror at Shepard's sudden intrusion.

The asari quickly buried her head in her hands, covering her eyes and sobbing uncontrollably. To Shepard's dismay, she was unharmed, and alone.

"Shiala?" the commander turned off her flashlight, approaching the asari huddled in corner. "What are you doing? Are you hurt? Who were you talking to?" Shepard looked around, then behind her. "What's going on?" she continued when Shiala didn't answer.

Shepard wasn't sure what to say. She put her hand on the asari's shoulder, she was cold. Shiala furiously shook her head in her arms, shrugging Shepard's hand off.

"I can hear them, Shepard."

Shepard was quiet. She put her gun on the floor.

"The whispers, Shepard... when I dream, when I look in the mirror, out of the corner of my eye I see them. Those creatures that… that…"

Shepard shushed her softly.

"Look at me, Shiala."

The asari shook her head again.

"Shiala, please."

Shepard gently took hold of her friend's forearms, trying to coax her out of her shell. Her attempts were met with surprisingly little resistance. Eventually, Shiala looked Shepard in the eye.

She didn't need to say anything. The guilt, the pain, the terror, it was all written in her eyes. The commander wanted nothing more than to wash it all away, but she wasn't that naïve. She'd been through her fair share of traumas, but none seemed to leave her as shattered as Shiala was now. It was unnatural, she thought, for a commando to break like this. But no training could have prepared her for what she dealt with.

She hadn't known the asari for long, or much about her, but she knew she had been a commando under Matriarch Benezia. She had had amongst the best military training in the galaxy. For her to be shaken to this extent… there was nothing Shepard could not say that would make it right. And Shepard felt a tiny part of her wither away in realisation.

"Help me Shepard," Shiala's voice was so quiet; if not for the silence in the apartment the commander probably wouldn't have heard it.

When Shepard failed to answer, Shiala looked away; tiny sobs began racking her body again.

Suddenly, the asari felt slender fingers tilt her chin up. She looked in the human commander's eyes once more. She'd never seen the commander with that look. It was a mix between desperation and comfort, as if Shiala's own feelings were being felt by the commander. Shepard then leaned in, slowly, maintaining eye-contact. The asari closed her eyes, feeling her lover's warm lips capture her own tenderly.

This kiss was so much different than those shared earlier that night. This was soft, comforting, loving. The insatiable lust was gone. Shiala could feel only the love Shepard was pouring in to the kiss. Languid, and long, they only broke apart when Shepard spoke.

"Come on, you can't stay here," Shiala was surprised when she felt herself be hoisted off the ground with ease. Shepard was not that much bigger than her, yet she lifted her as if she were nothing. Still, the asari wrapped her arms around her significant other's neck while burying her face in her collar. Her heart swelled and throbbed, but her nightmares wouldn't allow her the peace she so desperately craved.

Shepard set her down in their shared bed before climbing back in herself. The human pulled the covers over both of them before hugging the asari as close to her own body as possible. She stared deeply into Shiala's bright green eyes. And she realised Shepard was right: the bond wasn't necessary.

Shepard kept a close eye on her green asari. She had her hand on the small of Shiala's back, holding her tightly and close. Shepard stayed awake until Shiala finally fell asleep again. It was then, upon seeing her at peace finally, that the human commander realised it. Shiala wasn't going to be only a friend. Perhaps it was time that she moved on. Shepard needed someone, something to come back to. Fighting for an abstract ideal wasn't cutting it for her anymore. Shepard wanted more. She _needed_ more.

Later, Shepard decided she would take Shiala out on a date. They both needed to get their minds off things. She thought long and hard about where to go. She wanted to show her something remarkable on the Citadel. But there was so much here that she hadn't even seen yet. Not to mention Shiala was much older than she. She'd probably already seen it all, or at least much more than the human had.

There was this one place though. Hidden in plain sight, you could only see it out of the corner of your eye. No one ever stopped there, no one wanted to be there. Except Shepard, she wanted to be there, always.

Shepard leaned off the banister to head back to the apartment. She pushed her red hair out of her face. She'd have to cut it soon. It was getting rather tiresome, exceptionally so when there was wind. Wind, Shepard thought. The artificial environment of the Citadel was spectacular. It made her feel like it was all so real. It reminded her she was real.

Self-consciously she touched her scars. They were so faint now, in the light. But they burned. They burned with such ferocity in the dark emptiness of her heart. They burned with loss, with shame, with betrayal. She was running, but no matter how fast her cybernetics could make her go, reality was always around the corner. Out of the corner of her eye, Cerberus reminded her every day. The gates of the Tartarus they guarded, from its fires which she was forged, her true identity that had been stripped away, Shepard was lost in it all.

"Why…" Shepard heard herself saying.

_"Commander Shepard."_

_"Illusive Man, I thought we'd be meeting face-to-face."_

_"A necessary precaution. Not unusual for people who know what you and I know."_

_"You might be the reason I'm still alive. But that doesn't mean I trust you."_

_"You need to put your personal feelings aside. Humanity is up against the greatest threat of our brief existence."_

_"The Reapers."_

_"Good to see your memory's still intact. How are you feeling?"_

_"Cut to the chase. What are the Reapers doing that made you decide to bring me back?"_

_"We're at war. No one wants to admit but humanity is under attack. While you've been sleeping, entire colonies have been disappearing. Human colonies. We believe it's someone working for the Reapers. Just as Saren and the geth aided Sovereign. You've seen it yourself. You bested all of them. That's just one reason we chose you."_

_"Fighting a war doesn't seem like Cerberus. Why are you involved?"_

_"We're committed to the advancement and preservation of humanity. If the Reapers are targeting us, trying to wipe us out, Cerberus will stop them. If we wait for politicians or the Alliance to act, no more human colonies will be left."_

_"Sovereign was trying to harvest all life in the galaxy. Why would the Reapers target a few human colonies?"_

_"Hundreds of thousands of colonists have vanished. I'd say that fits the definition of 'harvesting.' Nobody's paying attention because it's random and the attacks occur in remote locations. I don't know why they've suddenly targeted humanity. Maybe you got their attention when you killed one of them."_

_"If this is a threat against humanity, you need to mobilize the Alliance."_

_"They suffered substantial losses fighting Sovereign, they're rebuilding, still stretched too thin to waste resources verifying the Reaper threat. Blaming the abductions on mercs and pirates is easy. And more convenient."_

_"You could have trained an entire army for what you spent to bring me back."_

_"You're unique. Not just in ability or what you've experienced, but in what you represent. You stood for humanity at a key moment. You're more than a soldier. You're a symbol. And I don't know if the Reapers understand fear, but you killed one. They have to respect that."_

_"If what you say is true… if the Reapers are behind this… I'd consider helping you."_

_"I'd be disappointed if you accepted any of this without seeing for yourself. I have a shuttle ready to take you to Freedom's Progress, the latest colony to be abducted. Miranda and Jacob will brief you."_

_"Miranda killed Wilson in cold blood. Jacob's just a gun for hire. You expect me to trust them?"_

_"Wilson was one of my best agents. But he was a traitor. Miranda did exactly what I expected of her. And she saved your life in more ways than one. Jacob's a soldier, one of the best. He's never fully trusted me, but he's always been honest about it. You'll be just fine with them… for now."_

_"Is this a volunteer job, or am I being volunteered?"_

_"You always have a choice, Shepard. If you don't find the evidence we're both looking for, we can part ways. But first, go to Freedom's Progress. Find any clues you can. Who's abducting the colonies? Do they have any connection to the Reapers? I brought you back. It's up to you to do the rest."_

Shepard shook her head, chasing the memory away. Ever since Cerberus rebuilt her, Shepard noticed her memory seemed disconcertingly vivid. And unpredictable. She made a mental note to talk to Thane about it. With a start, she checked her watch. She needed to get back to the apartment to get Shiala.

The light woke Shiala up. With a groan, she hid her face in the pillow. She felt a hand rest comfortingly on her shoulder.

"No…" she said feebly as the hand tugged on her shoulder, gently coaxing her out of the bed.

She felt the bed dip slightly as Shepard sat down next to her.

"Come on," she prompted seductively.

"But Shepard…" she whined with a giggle.

"I have something to show you," the human commander said playfully.

With that Shiala snuck a peek at the commander; she smiled softly before sitting up in all seriousness. She hugged the blankets to her bare chest, embarrassed.

"Would you let me dress first?"

"I don't know, I kind of like you like this."

The asari's smile got the better of her again, and she playfully punched Shepard in the shoulder. Shepard returned the smile, getting off the bed. Shiala quickly grabbed hold of the commander's hand. She pulled on it, and captured Shepard's lips with her own.

"You need to make up your mind," Shepard said softly after breaking the kiss.

"Thank you," Shiala ignored the human's comment. She pressed her forehead against the commander's. "For being you, amongst other things," she continued when she caught Shepard's confused look.

Shiala played with Shepard's hands, tracing her palm lines.

"Shiala…"

"I know this sounds strange. And that this is going rather quickly. At least, it seems so to me. I would not be surprised if… if this was too much, Shepard."

Shepard kissed Shiala again.

"It's fine, if I had a problem with it, this wouldn't be happening."

With that, Shepard straightened up, and left the room. The asari smiled, her fingers ghosting her lips where Shepard's were a moment ago. She could hardly believe any of it. It seemed surreal. But she wasn't going to complain. Not now.

Not ever.


	4. Chapter 4

The sight was breathtaking, in its own way of course. The busy traffic, the hover cars zooming back and forth, the lights, the life, all of it reflecting the carefree innocence that Shepard was desperately trying to preserve. It was tranquil, peaceful, and reminded Shepard of everything that mattered. She remembered one night having brought Garrus Vakarian here. He didn't share her views about it in the slightest. He was angry, even. That everyone could go about their lives so ignorantly while Shepard and he were bleeding on some planet, desperately fighting to survive.

_"We're fighting for them to survive too, Garrus,"_ she'd told him. He simply hadn't answered her, content with clicking his mandibles in thought.

Shepard wasn't sure that Garrus' life on Omega was as much a good idea as he made it out to be. It seemed to have done more wrong than good; she often caught herself thinking about it when they talked. But she couldn't blame the turian. Even when he was with her on the first Normandy, he'd always wanted to make a difference. It was why he'd joined her in the first place. She'd tried to temper him, and guide him, but even she only had so much reach. She continued her role as his mentor of sorts when she brought him back on the Normandy SR2. She was confident that he'd come around again. And he wasn't one to disappoint.

With a soft smile, Shepard huffed in content and pushed off the banister, crossing her arms over her chest. She turned to the asari standing silently by her.

"So? What do you think?"

"It's beautiful," Shiala answered not taking her eyes off the Presidium.

"Thought you might like it," the human commander said, uncrossing her arms to pull Shiala a little closer to her.

The asari turned to look at the commander. She said nothing, but her lips were slightly parted, and her eyes expectant. Shepard leaned in slowly, holding her breath. Her lips ghosted the asari's, teasing her. It felt like an eternity before Shepard finally closed the gap, and kissed her fervently. The kiss was gentle, nourishing the fire in Shiala's heart.

Shepard wasn't sure why, but every time she kissed Shiala, she felt complete. They hadn't been dating long, a little less than a few weeks at best. Yet, everything was going so fast. Shepard wondered if it was because she loved the asari. But whenever she thought too hard about it, about loving Shiala, all she could picture were blue eyes.

Shepard stopped kissing Shiala, slightly out of breath.

"Shepard," Shiala was the first to talk. "Have you ever thought about… another life?"

The commander leaned back against the guard rail, a thoughtful look on her face. The silence was comfortable though. Shiala always gave her space. She never doubted the commander's frequent pauses in their conversations. She'd accepted her as she was. Maybe that's why things were going so smoothly. Shepard chased away the tangent.

"Never," the human finally answered. "I'm a soldier, through and through."

Shiala smiled.

"Such dedication, it's rather…"

"Unexpected from a human?"

"Attractive."

"Is that so?" Shepard edged closer to the asari. She was acting coy, while Shepard kept staring at her lustfully. Shepard glided past the asari, her fingers brushing against her mate's forearm, before snaking her arms around her waist.

Shepard breathed hot air along Shiala's bare neck, earning soft moans in response. The human commander had been delighted when she found out Shiala's neck was particularly sensitive. She'd briefly wondered if all asari had secret spots like that. She could remember Liara's had been her lower back. She smiled softly at that. But it quickly faltered. Liara.

"Shepard?" Shiala's voice brought her back to reality. "What's wrong?" her mate asked when she caught a glimpse of Shepard's brooding complexion.

"It's nothing," the commander answered too quickly. "Let's go get something to bite, I'm really hungry!" Shepard tried to feign positivity. Truth be told, the commander felt terrible. Why was she lying? She had nothing to hide. What happened between Liara and her was well in the past. At least, for Liara it was. Shepard felt the wound was still fresh. But the archeologist had been too busy to concern herself with that.

Shepard snapped back to reality once again when she felt Shiala's hand brush her scarred cheek.

"Why are you crying?" the asari asked.

The spectre blinked rapidly in confusion.

"I… what…?" the commander clasped her hand over Shiala's. "I don't know, I…"

_Her pale blue eyes stared intently into hers. She'd been so reserved about it before. So controlled, but now, bare, the fire was almost palpable. Their lips crashed against each other's with pent up lust. They'd been waiting so long for this. To be able to finally show each other how they truly felt, to freely love each other, share each other. Liara was letting Shepard take the reins. For a little while._

_The human commander's apprehension disappeared as soon as Liara had finished stripping. She was even more beautiful than she could have ever imagined. Liara was brimming with a confidence she'd never seen her with as the human's eyes devoured every inch of her. Liara crossed her legs slightly, blocking the human's view. Shepard bit her lower lip fiercely. She was about to pounce on the asari before she was pushed back onto the bed with biotics. _

_Liara was wearing a very satisfied smirk. She edged to the bed, climbing atop of the immobilised Shepard. The human's heart was racing. She'd never been in a position like this. She'd always been in control, but for once being at the complete mercy of another… it was rather exciting!_

_Her love dropped the biotic field, and immediately pinned Shepard's arms above her head. She planted her lips on Shepard's fiercely. She trailed off, her lips kissing down her jawline, her neck. _

_"That's not fair," the commander finally said, bucking her hips into Liara's. The asari shot up immediately to look at Shepard, worry evident in her eyes. "You didn't say anything about being such a good kisser." Shepard reassured her. Liara giggled softly, her confidence coming back full force. _

_Shepard arched off the bed as best she could, kissing Liara full on the lips. As soon as she felt Liara's grip loosen, she flipped the tables. With a surprised yelp, Liara found herself pinned beneath the commander. She quickly took off her shirt, unbuckling her belt shortly afterwards. She pulled her pants down tauntingly slow, letting them rest slightly below the waist._

_Liara's eyes were darting from Shepard's chest to what her hands were doing, like she couldn't decide what to do. Smirking, Shepard took Liara's hands and placed them on her breasts. She could tell, even in the dimly lit room, that Liara was blushing furiously now. _

_Shepard slid her fingers between Liara's legs. With an excited yelp Liara shot off the bed, nearly sending Shepard flying backwards. She kissed the human furiously, wrapping her arms around her neck, pulling her as close as she could while Shepard continued teasing her. As Shepard increased the pace and intensity, Liara was panting heavily. The human crawled down the asari's bare chest, lingering only for a moment before trailing the tongue down her stomach. Liara was arching off the bed by the time Shepard's tongue reached its destination. She was out of breath, trying desperately to say something. The Spectre could hardly make it out until finally Liara shouted..._

"Shepard?"

The commander was lying on her back. Shiala was hovering over her, obviously very worried. The human's breathing was ragged. She winced as she got to a sitting position.

"Are you alright?" Shiala's concern was not unwarranted, Shepard was sure.

"What happened?"

"You… collapsed," the green asari was unsure with her response, making Shepard frown.

"What do you mean?" she pursued the matter.

"What do you remember?"

"Well I was standing, for one, and we were on the balcony."

"And?"

"Well that's it…" Shepard wasn't liking how Shiala seemed so distant. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"That was hours ago."

Shepard's mouth hung open slightly.

"_Hours_ ago? What happened!" Shepard shouted, finally realising she was in a hospital bed.

"You seemed to have been reliving a rather unpleasant memory. You were crying, and were incoherent for the most part."

Shepard blinked a few times, that wasn't what she remembered. But Shiala seemed sincere about it.

"What's happening to me…" Shepard muttered defeated. She hung her head low. Her bright red hair was blocking her view. She could tell Shiala seemed to fidgeting, but little else.

"This… is not the first time?"

"No, of course not," Shepard snorted angrily for some reason she couldn't explain. The asari flinched at her tone, making Shepard look up. "I'm sorry."

"I should let you rest," the commando said suddenly exiting the room, leaving a perplexed Shepard behind.

Shiala closed the glass door. She was trying her best not to cry. Shepard had said not remembering anything. But Shepard's words were still fresh in her mind.

_"I love you, Liara."_


End file.
